Pretty much right after I started this blog (I consider the official start date to be Dec. 1st), my relationship with C hit the rocks. Drama-central. Long story short, I tried like hell to save the relationship, tried everything I could think of, offered to do anything it took (to the response of “I don’t know”)…
The final straw was… well… complicated. There’s many pieces:
C and D violated the fluid bond agreement established by A and B, who do not accept condoms as a safe alternative to getting new partners tested. Of course, C was never told she couldn’t have sex with D, just that she needed to tell me if she did so I could stop having sex with her.
Well… she never told me. Possibly because we “stopped having sex” as a result of her complaint that it seemed to her like I was “just there for the sex”. Well, apparently as soon as I stopped, she started with D. Then there was the one night where she initiated play with me, and things went further than she anticipated (because, duh, she got me all worked up then rolled over and said “OK, I’m done”.)
So at some point D mentions to B “we are being safe and using condoms”… Huh? Well, we never actually had a chance to talk to him to go over the rules, but C was supposed to have….
B confronts C, who says “no, we aren’t having sex”.
I confront D, who says “yes, we are”.
C throws a conniption because “I don’t trust her”.
B throws a conniption because “C lied to her” (which I don’t know for certain, but believe is true).
I refuse to leave C because, honestly, B is prone to hearing things that aren’t said, and not hearing things that are said. There’s a reasonable doubt that this is all just a misunderstanding.
A and B both want to talk to C and settle things so that they can stop being angry.
C invites us all out to dinner, but declines to have a discussion, so A and be decline to go, which results in C phoning me, wherein the first words out of her mouth after I say “hello” are “fuck you”. She then proceeds to lay into ME for A and B wanting to talk things over with her. Tells me we are NEVER having sex again, and swears to me that the one time we had sex after she started with D was all my fault because she was asleep when it happened (bullshit!)
So, it’s over. I’ll miss the good sex. I’ll miss the passion. I already miss the rituals we shared. Some day I’m sure I’ll even miss her, as soon as I’m done being pissed. I just hope she regains her sanity some day, because that seems to be gone. I worry about D. He’s in a rough spot right now. Or maybe not. Maybe she’s lying to him about what’s happening, and I’m sure he’s buying into whatever she sells him…
For the time being, things are slightly better between myself and A and B. On one hand, I’m pleased with that and hope the upward trend continues. On the other hand I’m kind of pissed that it took C leaving me for this to happen. I’m worried that when some time passes, things will go back to where they were. And if that happens, I may lose some more.